Tuesday, 17 July 2012

If everything was not just so black and white

I feel we are coming to the end of our hell. I dont know how it is going to happen and when, though I do feel it is coming sooon.. as it is too painful for both me and Gracie and destructive and depriving. We have this deap love, bond and connection and we pine for eachother all the time. I can feel it in her.. She knows she will never meet anyone as great as me. That is what Gracie thinks of me!! and there is no reason why she should not.

Hey it would be different if I was a bad mother, but I am not and I have made bad choices and ran away back in january 28th last year and I came back to uk from Ireland and France and I have not left the country since. I have got angry and upset in the past because they are constantly depriving my child of the best life she could ever dream of... and she knows that and she feels that... and she feels like she is just deprived and being treated unfairly and she does not understand why... but she just knows that she is the only child in the class that does not ever get to see her special mummy walk into that nursery...

no wonder she never listens much for my voice hey... she listens all the time.. she always hopes maybe one day mummy will walk in... but mummy is not even allowed to know what nursery Gracie goes to or were she lives... mummy is treated like a baddy... when mummy is the goody and wants to help the world... so why is everyone calling me bad and keeping my child from me... when I have no desire to leave and go anywhere... there is nothing dangerous going on... there is no need for them to keep us seperated...

I will be honest... Gracie was put into care because I was stupid and sent the social services an email saying about love being stronger and that they are energy steeling from me and then they went and put Gracie into care because I offered them money for my daughter.... It was half a joke... but wouldnt any good parent give anything for their child??? even their last pennies?? is that a reason to put my child in foster care????

Why do they want to deprive us?... do you think they secretly energy steel on purpose?? I think people are puppets!! they are just controlled themselves it seems... to just think and believe what they choose and not what is real!! They are also control and power mad!! they also fear for their word being tampered with!! why is this system allowed to be run like this, in a country of democracy ?????

oh its insane man!!! do people just not see how messed up our system is when dealing with people and families!!!!

When I made the video , they dont really care about us, it was around the time of the riots... and it did get me angry at them even more.... because I was one of those people who was being misstreated in every way by the system... I was a member of the publice being abused by authorities and there are many people being abused!!!!

yes you just want us to shut up and put up with it!! its not fair what they did to me... I also made black and white by micheal jackson too... I might as well make it visible to see anyways... I did most of my videos last year as you can see... cos my hair is different... i am really blond now..

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